Uncivilized

An ancient ape, once upon a time,

Disliked exceedingly to climb.

And so he picked him out a tree

And said: "Now this belongs to me;

I have a hunch that mocks are mutts,

And I can make them gather nuts

And bring the bulk of them to me

By claiming title to this tree.”

 

He took a green leaf and a reed

And wrote himself a title deed,

Proclaiming, pompously and slow:

“All monkeys by these presents know!"

Next morning, when the monkeys came

To gather nuts; he made his claim:

“All monkeys climbing on this tree

Must bring their gathered nuts to me,

Cracking the same on equal shares;

The meats are mine, the shells are theirs."

 

—"By what right?" they all cried, amazed,

Thinking the monk was surely crazed.

—"By this,” he answered, "if you'll read,

You'll find it is a title deed,

Made in precise and formal shape,

And sworn before a fellow ape,

Exactly on the legal plan

Used by that wondrous creature, Man,

In London, Tokyo, New York,

Glengarry, Kalmazoo and Cork.

Unless my deed is recognized,

It proves you quite uncivilized."

 

—“But," said one monkey, "you'll agree

It was not you who made this tree.”

 

—"Nor," said the ape, serene and bland,

“Does any owner make his land;

Yet it and hereditaments

Are his, and figure in the rents."

 

The puzzled monkeys sat about;

They could not make the question out.

Plainly, by precedent and law,

The ape's procedure showed no flaw;

And yet, no matter what he said,

The stomach still denied the head.

 

Up spoke one sprightly monkey then:

"Monkeys are monkeys, men are men;

This ape should try his legal capers

On men, who may respect his papers.

We don't deeds, we do know our nuts,

And spite of 'and' and 'ifs' and 'buts',

We know who gathers and unmeats 'em,

By monkey practice who eats 'em.

So tell this ape and all his flunkeys

No man tricks can be played on monkeys."

 

Thus apes still climb to get their food,

Since monkey's minds are crass and crude;

And monkeys, all so ill-advised,

Still eat their nuts uncivilized.

EDMUND VANCE COOKE

The monkeys refused to recognize the claims of an astute ape sitting as a banker. Monkeys are "uncivilized”. They keep on gathering nuts, and eating the meat of the nuts they have gathered.

Men know better. They will not gather nuts (produce goods) without a permit. The dealers in permits, chartered "on the legal plan', may demand for the permits two times, or more, the price of the goods. Men will then go half starved before mountains of goods which they can produce but are unable to pay. And the bigger their pile of nuts, the less can they feed on. Indeed, men are "civilized".

Bankers' civilization.